There is no shortage of avenues for saving your marriage these days.
Therapy sessions, group workshops, retreats, watching videos.
There are a variety of options when looking at managing your marriage but the big question is – Does marriage counseling work?
Typically within marriage counseling the counselor or therapist gives you both equal time to talk, with equal attention given to both of you to make sure it is a fair environment. This way you’ll both have equal time, getting your story across without any interruptions or arguments. A counselor is aware that in many cases one of the partners are coming along reluctantly and will, ideally, try to make that person feel comfortable.
It’s a common situation…
One partner may be uneasy about attending for the sheer vulnerability it opens them up to. In some circumstances, they may be having an affair and they are frightened of being found out but a counselor . After all, most marriage counselors with an excellent level of experience will work out when something doesn’t seem right with what they are being told.
READING YOUR PARTNER’S MIND
The problem with therapy comes down to a limitation that can’t be controlled. A counselor isn’t a mind reader. Sharing intimate details with a neutral party can be refreshing for some. For others, though, this approach may seem intimidating and unrealistic.
By now, you have already shared time as a married couple and know quite a bit about each other’s backgrounds and how this may impact issues now. Some things are best left unsaid, not every detail needs to be discussed or analyzed to make you work better as a couple.
HEARING WHAT YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR
It is likely that within marriage counseling you will hear many, many, MANY things that stay in your mind and feel unresolved. So when looking at whether or not marriage counseling works, consider that it opens up more questions to think about.
There will be things you didn’t even realize were a problem that suddenly feel huge and even after reaching a resolution during the session it stays with you. You might feel unable to shake them off. One good strategy for your own marriage guidance is learning how to listen. I call this process reflection or active listening.
Give your partner eye contact, sit down and make sure your arms aren’t folded. Don’t distract yourself with any other activities. This will make them feel they have your undivided attention.
Occasionally, nod slightly or repeat back key points to encourage them to say more.
MEN AND WOMEN
If you are a man reading this, remember, you’ll feel eater to solve whatever problem she is presenting but hold back and keep listening. On the whole, most women just want to be heard. They’re not always looking for an immediate answer to a problem.
She simply wants to talk about it. If you are a woman doing the listening, try to temper your sensitive side, stay focused and look interested. Even if you are tired or late for an important event in your day, effective listening is crucial within a relationship.
It is hard to find a good time for talking and taking a moment from your busy day is similar to having an hour spent at counseling. You are giving the gift of your devoted time and showing them they’re extremely important in your world.
FINDING A MARITAL EXPERT
Many experts in the field of marriage guidance are bound to be colored by their own experiences or how their day is going with its own general ups and downs. Being a marriage guidance counselor doesn’t ensure their own marriage is a success.
Some individuals offering marriage guidance or marital therapy services don’t even have specialized marriage experience and possibly try their hand at occasional couples counseling.
Based on their mass amount of counseling knowledge working with individuals they feel it would translate into sorting through marriage issues as well.
DOES MARRIAGE COUNSELING WORK ONLINE?
You don’t have to immediately invest in a dedicated counselor. Marriage counseling education online can be extremely effective in bringing you both back together with a more positive way forward.
Think about these advantages if you’re on the fence about online marriage restoration;
You are fitting it into your day, around your schedule and what works for you.
No need to discuss the counseling you are working through unless you feel you want to.
Fun and thought provoking real life exercises that you can put into practice now.
Being able to work through a variety of resources to find what works for you, pulling on the contributions of real experts. You can create your own therapy plan based on your customized needs.
So, to answer the question, does marriage counseling work? Yes, but finding the best approach for you is fundamental to your success. No matter what, it takes time and commitment. Really, there’s no way around this.
The internet is inevitably an excellent starting point and by reading this article you are making to first steps towards a brighter tomorrow.
Help yourself now by watching my free video on how to restore your marriage, rekindling romance in minutes.