A strong, healthy marriage requires regular maintenance. Even the most loving couples can find themselves in a struggle with their relationship routine.
While there are plenty of resources available, finding the right fit for your marriage can be an added challenge when you find yourself facing these struggles.
Books, websites, therapists with varying approaches and relationship workshops only top the list of some of these resources.
Finding the right match for you and your mate should be in line with your core values as a couple. As a Christian couple, this might lead you to explore the option of Christian marriage counseling. You also might be wondering…
What is Different about Christian counseling?
Taking a faith-based approach that is in line with your own beliefs is incredibly beneficial to establishing trust with your counselor.
Let’s face it; marriage counseling is an act of vulnerability.
There are a variety of concerns that may arise for each spouse. When the relationship has suffered significant deterioration, these concerns are magnified.
What will my spouse say about me?
What will the therapist think of me?
What if we don’t agree on the therapist’s advice?
Am I going to suffer blame or humiliation?
These are all valid concerns.
The therapeutic environment is one that is supposed to promote safety, comfort and healing. Christian marriage counseling should address the spiritual aspects of healing the relationship (and each partner in it) in addition to the emotional and psychological aspects.
What Can I Expect from Christian counseling?
Prayer, spiritual support and Biblical advice are all components that a Christian marriage counselor will provide.
Ideally, the session will be an exploration of the spiritual roots of the problems in the relationship. Spiritual solutions will be explored as the couple learns to grow closer together and to God.
All relationships require tools. A good counselor will provide these tools along with instructions on how to use them. Often, when couples find themselves in the counselor’s office, all they have been using a hammer on one another.
Other couples may have tried duct tape; temporary and fragile solutions to problems which require time, care and tools to properly fix. Rebuilding a relationship, strengthening the foundation or repairing damage requires the right tools for the job.
A Biblically based approach will help the couple develop these tools and keep things in line with their core values. It doesn’t make much sense to use blueprints for a cottage to build a mansion.
Yet, that is exactly what many couples do in their relationships. They rely upon old habits and skills to resolve problems that develop progressively through the years. Expanding the toolbox and the knowledge of how to use the instruments in it is the ideal way to build a healthy, lasting marriage.
So How Do We Find the Right Christian Counselor for Our Needs?
Finding the right counselor, even when you have narrowed the search to a Christian counselor can seem like a daunting task.
Add in busy work schedules, kids with school and sports schedules and the hectic daily routines of life, and it can become really overwhelming.
Online counseling is an excellent option for couples interested in exploring guidance in their relationship. Rather than jumping in with a weekly office appointment, couples can sit down together in the comfort of their own home and begin to familiarize themselves with the aspects of Christian marriage counseling.
What’s It All About?
Practical guides and tools become accessible through activities and exercises designed by a professional to bring spiritual, mental and emotional healing to your marriage. This option is ideal for couples who are fearful of face to face interactions regarding the most personal aspects of their lives with a stranger.
It also opens up the lines of communication between spouses so that they can begin to truly work on the relationship together.
Often, a counselor’s office can become a place for spouses to seek an ally in their argument. Counselors commonly face the issue of “he said, she said” and are torn in navigating the complexities of the issues.
An online format radically eliminates this errant dynamic and promotes true growth and healing. Christian formats function to keep the couple on track in their faith, priorities and relationship health.
Saving or strengthening your marriage requires time, effort, honesty and skill development.
Christian marriage counseling is an excellent resource for taking these steps. No matter what, it is up to the couple to put in the time and effort.
The counselor can only take the couple as far as they are willing to go in their own healing.
Taking the Next Step
There is no stopping the healing process when priorities are realigned to proper order and the couple is equipped with new and appropriate tools and the willingness to use them. Christian counseling is an excellent place to begin.
To take the next step towards building the foundation for marriage restoration and success, make sure you check out my free video here on saving your marriage today!